I Love Parisians . . .

. . . just stopping for quick catnap, complete with ambience - if not discretion.

Ahh Paris . . .

. . . yes, it's dark & blurry, but it doesn't take the City of Light to see the sash & bow placement is a little "off".

Leave it to the Parisians . . .

. . . to forever change the image of Santa in my mind.

Winterfest in Hyde Park . . .

. . . was delightfully charming, but not without a few stings.

Now who gets THIS seat??? 

Every Trip to London . . .

. . . is incomplete withoujt a Jamaican Sidewalk Santa.  You've never quite heard Jingle Bells quite the same...

Beige Woman Collides with Color on London Street . . .

. . . and what a splash it was.  Pity, there was nothing there to help her.

The Photo is Domestic . . .

. . . but the product is indeed English . . .and a very badly named food.

European DON'T . . .

. . . no matter how cute your little "friend" may be, if he is not human, don't place him in a highchair, call him Marvin and serve him champagne during Christmas Luncheon. 

Primarialy because it's a terrible waste of good champagne!

European DON'T . . .

. . . naming the corner pub after a particularly violent & gruesome punishment?  Makes you wonder what they're serving from the menu, no?

Hey Mister Cell Phone Man . . .

This man is beginning to trouble me.  At first, he was just a new face at Crew.  Then he became the guy at Crew who never spoke to anyone except his cell phone.  OK, perhaps his best friend or significant other lives out of town and this is hopw they spend time together.

After three weeks of that, we determined his significant other IS his cell phone.

Then this man started appearing in other parts of town.  He was on my neighborhood bus - twice - and on his cell phone.
He was in my neighborhood grocer - no cart, no hand basket, just wandering through Jewel - on his cell phone.

Make note of this guy . . . I have a feeling we're not finished with him on here yet.

What is He Thinking?

At first glance, perhaps he's pondering the truck parked on the snow bank (he could smell the testosterone).  However he stood there suck a long time, I wondered what was going through his mind . . .

"I'm standing here, posing in front of Crew because I am so hot.

"I look so cool & tough because I can stand here without my coat."

"I look so good in this outfit with my jeans just casually "jujshed" into the top of my boots."

"I must look really good because that whole table in the window of Crew is all looking at me!"

Chicago Snow Parking . . .

. . . never ceases to amuse me.  Some guy (or gal) felt SO butch after getting his truck jacked up on that snow bank.  You can still smell the testosterone around that truck.

'Bout 20 Years Ago, Way Down in New Orleans . . .

. . . this woman was the star of a little community theatre production of Victor/Victor.  Six curtain calls to standing ovations.  RAVE reviews in the local community press.  (Just ask her - they're all in that plaid bag/cart).

. . . and she's still dressing in the moment.

Ya! My Name is Hilda . . .

. . . I am from Sveden and I like to pretend I am still 20 years old, wear bright colors and flirt with men in airports.  I especially like men with giant holes in the back of their jeans.  YA!

Ummmmmm . . . No.

How many times do we have to go through this?

No boots with your pajamas!

By All Means . . .

. . . dress to look like a giant bottle of Pepto Bismol.

Off the Grid . . .

. . . and yes, he realizes it.  Just a little too late. 

Only in Chicago . . .

Now personally, I think this might be a great idea . . . but I detest screeching infants in public.  So I may not be objective in this case.

Instead, let's think about what might have been going on in the mind of this individual, shall we?

Thought #1:
"Junior is all grown up so we don't need this anymore.it gets one more thing out of the basement."
Translation:
"It get's one more piece of crap out of my basement."  (Because you know that thing is staying out there until spring.  Neighbors will be lucky if it makes it into the dumpster by June.)

Thought #2:
"People will think there is a baby in this & they will NEVER take THIS parking spot."
Translation:
They aren't too bright if they truly believe someone will think a baby is inside & just drive by.

Thought #3:
"This is funny!  The crazy lady next door will freak!  And it will save our parking spot, anyway."
Translation:  Yes - it IS funny.  But the looney bin next door will not only take the parking spot, but she's calling the police to report her neighbor for leaving a baby outside to be stolen.

Come In Agent 99 . . .

. . . I have KAOS in sight.

Oh. Wait.   Never mind 99, it's just my reflection in a mirror. 

What IS That Around Her Neck?

a.)  a sofa cushion?
b.)  her leftover holiday wreath?
c.)  a giant donut with chocolate frosting & nuts with a scoop of raspberry sorbet?

And I won't even start on the robot boots . . .

Magic Scarves!

Hmmm . . . not magical yet.  And only $9.99?!?
A new fashion low. And you thought it couldn't be done. 

Don't Understand the Rage Over "Housewives of Beverly Hills"?

 

Hmmm - go shopping at Target.
You'll understand then.

We're actually TRAINING little girls to be them now.